Saturday, May 14, 2005

How likely? Very likely.

In response to the comment on my previous post:

"Yes, I would like to think that should such a horrible thing happen, I would move heaven and hell and re-arrange whatever pieces in what I usually call my life to take care of this kid---despite how irrational and illogical it sounds---because I guess in the long run, making sure this kid grows up to know he had two parents that loved him very much is (I think) more important to me than dallying along with my so-called life-plans."

It seems silly to try to speak definitively on the matter (because really, it is in the end one of those decisions that must be made again when and if it comes to your world, face-to-face, in the heat of the moment). I'd like to think that reflects what my friend Dave means to me---doesn't laying down one's whole life for a friend also constitute laying down a very much alive life too?---but maybe I'm just being wishful. Either way you look at it, what I said I meant and so, that's all I really can say at the present moment in time. Sometimes the best decisions in one's life are the ones he never makes because they sound so absurd, so hard, so illogical and so totally selfless. To me, this sounds like one of those decisions; so how could I say "No!"???


Carol said...

Neville - you are right on about your enthusiasm and your willingness to fulfill this role. I don't even know why this "anonymous" person is questioning it. Besides the awful thought of maybe stepping up to be a parent in CASE of the need, you get to be "Uncle" to the little guy/girl. (see my post: Life is all about that - hang in there with your joy.

Anonymous said...

All I am saying is this. I really doubt that you would get custody of this child. I mean come on your name is not on anything. The Grandparents I am totally sure would be the ones that decide who the child goes to and I highly doubt that they are going to give this child to a single male that is in his early twenties. I just don't think it is possible or even smart of them.

Like I said before I would be extremely greatful for the relationship like you have with your friends but come. How really realistic is this?

Neville said...

I guess I'll just have to cross that bridge when it comes Anonymous.

And the grandparents will not get the baby b/c that is in writing, legally speaking (they do not want the baby to go to them---partially b/c they're divorced). So as to if the baby would go to me or not, I'm not sure. But again, I'm not assuming this would happen now. What if it happens in 12 years? Then what? It would be a different question then, wouldn't it?

Also, have you seen the kind of parents that are getting custody of their children nowadays???