"i would NEVER wear somebody else's pants!"

ah, the joys and wonders of substitute teaching at a bratty, inland empire southern california christian high school. today, mr. williams was out sick (because of his students? possibly) and today, i decided to wear my grandpa pants that look very "in" and 60's-retro-urban-fashion-conscious and hold that "polyester is not dead!" flare to them. anyways, just when i thought it was okay to wear such a thing in such a workplace, i was told "those are some cool pants! i'm gonna have to get me some of those!" (NOTICE: at first, i thought this little stuck-up sophomore was being facetious, but then i realized he really wanted to know). "Oh, actually I got them at a garage sale in Michigan last summer for $2. i think they belonged to this grandpa but since they have a small hole in them they wanted to get rid of them," I replied. and that's when it happened.

the boy's post-pubescant face turned sour with disgust, and he took a step or two away from mr. william's desk while beginning to whine and cry out, "Oughahahgh! You're wearing some old guys' pants! that's sick!!" i was "slightly" surprised and taken a back. "excuse me?" i asked him. "You're wearing some other person's pants! How can you do that! I would never be caught dead wearing someone else's pants!"

Now, I must be honest...a huge part of me wanted to take this little kid out. I wanted to expose something about him in front of his peers (i.e., maybe "oh yeah, well the kid in the abercrombie sweatshop who was making and sowing your shorts together ran around with them on naked for hours and hours before shipping them to the store!") or something like that. i wanted to tell him how silly and pious and ridiculous and snobby it was of him to hold to such a position. i wanted to give him directions to the local goodwill and force his parents to buy him nothing but clothes from there from now on. i wanted his little stupid high school mind changed, now!

BUT, my reactions were reserved into a kind "that's ridiculous," while the rest of the class explained how stupid that was of him to think. after a person offered up the "you can wash clothes, you know?" idea up to this kid, i felt like my mind raves were not needed anymore and so, decided to think about other things. was it just being around high school kids that made me so angry? or was it the fact that this was a christian high school and i was hoping (stupidly?) for a little more humility among students?

maybe after overhearing a conversation in a previous class where this was uttered by one senior student..."my bible teacher said that if you say 'oh my God,' it's the only sin that God won't forgive! and the only reason you all don't know that is b/c you're just freshmen!" while i then try to intervene and say "i think that's a misinterpretation of Matthew 12:32," and they all look at me like, "what's a misinterpretation????" or maybe i've finally lost my little mind. if that's the case, it seems sort of funny i guess...that it took a christian high school to do it for me. like, THAT was what made me go 'over the edge!'

yet, now that i think about it, i guess that's not so shocking or crazy after all. is it?